REFLECTIONS: FR. JUDE'S SUNDAY -- FEAST OF THE HOLY FAMILY

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20-12-04

Dear Friend,
? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? For most people Christmas ends on Christmas Day. After that 
they are thinking of post-Christmas sales and shopping bargains. For the 
Church, Christmas continues and immediately after Christmas day we celebrate 
the feast of the Holy family, because Christmas is a family feast and God 
comes to us in the family. May we discover our God at home with us!? Have 
homely Christmas celebration! -Fr. Jude

Sunday Reflections: The Holy Family? ? ? ? ? ? ? Family life in the Lord 
26-12-04
Readings: Sirach 3:2-6.12-14;? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?? Colossians 
3:12-21;? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? Mt. 2:13-15.19-23:

In the first reading from the Book of Ecclesiasticus, Ben Sirach, the wise 
man writes encouraging younger people to respect the older ones. Too often 
we think of the fourth commandment solely in terms of the obligation of 
young children being obedient towards their parents. That is true but there 
is another part equally important as well: the obligation of grown-up sons 
and daughters towards their elderly parents, that they might be able to live 
out their final years in comfort and dignity. Because of the pace of life 
and our own personal priorities, we can sideline the elderly and senile. Yet 
under God we owe them everything. Ben Sirach reminds us that kindness to 
parents will bring down God's blessings.

My Father, My Son
In his book My Father, My Son, Dr. Lee Salk describes a moving interview 
with Mark Chapman, the convicted slayer of Beatle John Lennon. At one point 
of his interview, Chapman says: "I don't think I ever hugged my father. He 
never told me he loved me. I needed emotional support. I never got that." 
Chapman's description of how he would treat a son if he ever had one, is 
especially tragic, because he would probably, never get out of jail and have 
a family of his own. He says: "I would hug my son and kiss him. and just let 
him know.. He could trust me and come to me. and [I would] tell him that I 
loved him." Dr. Salk ends his book with this advice to fathers and sons. It 
applies equally well to mothers and daughters. "Don't be afraid of your 
emotions, of telling your father or your son that you love him and that you 
care. Don't be afraid to hug and kiss him. Don't wait until the death bed to 
realize what you missed."
Mark Link in Sunday Homilies

In the second reading St. Paul in his letter to the Colossians, describes 
how we should live as Christians and in particular how we should live in the 
community and in our families. We are called to be saints: compassionate, 
accepting and forgiving one another. Difference and misunderstandings are 
bound to happen but we should be the first to forgive and reconcile, not 
standing on our rights, dignity and position, but being always the first to 
make a move, to give in, and not keep a record of wrongs. St. Paul reminds 
his listeners of the garment that we should be wearing as family members. 
"Over all these clothes, to keep them together and complete them, put on 
love."

Becoming a saint at home!
There was a young lad who decided to become a saint. He went down to the 
library and got a couple of books on the lives of saints, in the hope that 
he might find one who could be his role model. He actually chose St. Simon 
Stylites, one of the most unusual saints in the calendar. Simon lived many 
centuries ago and the story is that he lived on top of a very high pillar in 
the middle of the town square. What drew the young lad to select him was, 
well, if you are going to be a saint, you might get as much publicity out of 
it as possible! I mean, everybody in town knew Simon, and everybody knew he 
was a saint, despite the fact that if he were alive today, he'd probably be 
locked up! The problem our young friend had was that there was no pillar in 
the middle of the town square. He opted for humble beginnings, so he got a 
chair in the kitchen, and stood on it. Shortly after that, his mother wanted 
to get to the sink, so he had to move his chair. Then it was his sister 
trying to get to the fridge, and he had to move again. Shortly afterwards, 
his brother came in the back door, bumped into him, and knocked him off the 
chair onto the floor. Eventually, he had to abandon his efforts, and as he 
put the chair to one side, he declared with complete conviction "No, it's 
not possible, it's just not possible to become a saint at home!" The reality 
is that it is not possible to become a saint anywhere else! Bloom where you 
are planted, just as the seed of Jesus' message must grow in the heart in 
which it is planted.
Jack McArdle in 'And that's the Gospel truth'

In today's gospel Matthew describes the Holy family of Nazareth, as they 
endevoured to live the mission God had given them. While the first reading 
spoke of the obligation and duty of children towards their parents, the 
Gospel speaks in particular of the duty of parents, of caring and protecting 
their children.? Just because God was with them, the Holy Family did not 
have it easy; they were not spared the difficulties and trials of family 
life. As soon as they realized that their child was in danger, they uprooted 
themselves and went in exile. They shared the lot of many homeless families 
that lived in constant danger and had no place to call home. When they had 
somewhat settled in Egypt, when the danger was passed, they again uprooted 
themselves and began life once again in Nazareth.? What kept them going was 
their deep faith that this was the plan of God and this was the way He 
wanted it. They lived a hidden life unknown by most people, never in the 
limelight, living the life like most ordinary humans do; the daily routine 
of human existence made special only by their faith. Theirs was an 
extraordinary family. Joseph was not the father of his child. Their son was 
the Son of God and Jesus though son of God grew up like any other child in 
age. They did not claim any special privileges and were given none. They 
accepted their extraordinariness, learning from each other and accepting the 
uniqueness of each other unquestioningly. The two dreams of Joseph recounted 
in today's gospel, remind us of the patriarch Joseph whose dreams were 
instrumental in saving his family, Israel. Jesus is now the new Israel 
guided by the dreams of another Joseph.

Today's gospel could also remind us that while Christ's coming could be a 
source of joy, it could also be a source of trial and pain. The Holy Family 
was put into difficulty precisely because Jesus was part of their life. For 
many today, Christmas perhaps is not a joyful occasion but a painful one, 
because of family problems, loneliness, family feuds raked up and painful 
memories recalled. For others the season is painful because of special 
circumstances of their families that make them unique and not easily 
accepted by society. Today's families are fragile, and fraught with dangers. 
There are 'Herods' who seek to kill the child before it is born, there are 
others who seek to terminate life for those who are senile.? The only way to 
live with one another, is to life for one another. The Holy Family can be an 
inspiration to our families. Our families can be holy families, when we 
discover that God is in our midst, Emmanuel, God is with us.

We wanted to stay together.
In his new book, 'All Rivers run to the Sea,' Elie Wiesel recalls the 
terrible moment when his family had to make a critical choice. The war was 
coming to an end, but the deportation of Jews continued. Elie, his parents 
and three sisters faced deportation from their village in Hungary to the 
concentration camp in Berkenau. Maria, a Christian and the family's 
house-keeper, begged the Wiesels to hide in her family cabin in the 
mountains. At first the Wiesels declined, but Maria persisted. The family 
gathered at the kitchen table for a family meeting: should they go with 
Maria, or stay and take their chances. The family decided to stay. Elie 
Wiesel remembers: "But why?" Maria implored us, her voice breaking. 
"Because" my father replied, "a Jew must never be separated from his 
community. What happens to everyone happens to us as well." My mother 
wondered aloud whether it might not be better "to send the children with 
Maria." We protested: We're young and strong. The trip won't be as dangerous 
for us. If anyone should go with Maria, it's you. After a brief discussion, 
we thanked Maria. "My father was right. We wanted to stay together, like 
everyone else. Family unity is one of our most important traditions. the 
strength of the family tie, which has contributed to the survival of our 
people for centuries."? The war did not end soon enough for the Wiesels. 
Only Elie and two of his sisters survived. His mother, father, and youngest 
sister died in camps.
Quoted in 'Connections' Newsletter

May our family be a? home for God in our midst!

Fr. Jude Botelho
jude@netforlife.plus.com

PS. The stories, incidents and anecdotes used in the reflections have been 
collected over the years from books as well as from sources over the net and 
from e-mails received. Every effort is made to acknowledge authors whenever 
possible. If you send in stories or illustrations I would be grateful if you 
could quote the source as well so that they can be acknowledged if used in 
these reflections.? These reflections are also available on my website: 
www.netforlife.net Thank you!